For better understanding am going to define the meaning of feminism from different source and with link beneath it as prove for my write-up/article.

DEFINITION OF FEMINISM

1. According to Wikipedia

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Feminism

Feminism is a range of social movements, political movements, and ideologies that aim to define, establish, and achieve the political, economic, personal, and social equality of the sexes.

2. According to Merriam Webster dictionary

https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/feminism

the theory of the political, economic, and social equality of the sexes
organized activity on behalf of women’s rights and interests

DEFINITION OF FEMINIST

According to Cambridge dictionary

A person who believes in feminism, and tries to achieve change that helps women to get equal opportunities and treatment.

DEFINITION OF MAN-HATING

according to robin Morgan definition

He defined “man-hating” as the right of the oppressed class to hate the class that is oppressing them.

according to urban dictionary

https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Manhaters

Someone who is not fond of men.
A person, usually female, who despises, hates, and loathes the entire male population for no valid reason. The person, again usually female, believes that all men are scum no matter what and that all men are all lying, cheating, no good assholes. This idea is usually formed at birth, or because of a bad relationship with one particular male.
A woman who hates men. Usually because of a relationship that went bad or a bad run in with a male. These women seem to think that one man represents the entire male population and thus all men are lying, cheating, and cruel scumbags that will do nothing but fuck you over and ruin your life. These women are usually very close-minded and ridiculously irrational and judgmental. Basically a real cunt.4A person who dislikes men.
A bitter woman who thinks all men are scum without reason, and hates a man just because he is of the male gender. It’s often the result of an important male figure in her life hurting her emotionally.
A man hater is the number one kind of woman that men are afraid of the most.
A lesbian. Lesbian = Man-hater

DEFINITION OF MISANDRY

According to wikipedia

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Misandry

Misandry is the hatred of, contempt for, or prejudice against men or boys in general. Misandry may be manifested in numerous ways, including social exclusion, sex discrimination, hostility, gynocentrism, matriarchy, belittling of men, violence against men, and sexual objectification

According to Cambridge dictionary

https://dictionary.cambridge.org/dictionary/english/misandry

Feelings of hating men

DEFINITION OF MISANDRIST

According to merriam-websters dictionary

https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/misandrist

A person who hates men
Characterized by or expressing misandry or hatred of men

MY PERSONAL PROVES AGAINST THE ARGUMENTS OF MEN LINKING FEMINSIM WITH MISANDRY (MAN-HATING)

Speaking as someone who knows a thing or two about social contracts, moral obligations, philosophy of government, and feminist philosophy, I feel these arguments seriously the most pathetic – laughably pathetic – idea some men have about feminism. Clearly from the definition of both terms, there is a clear difference between feminism and misandry. With these write-up I deserve to pose a further refutation against such idea from such men in the society.

However, here are my personal proves against the 8 arguments of men linking feminism with misandry (man-hating):

FIRST ARGUMENT (feminist cannot attain equality with men)

For better understanding am going to define the meaning of equality from different source and with link beneath it as prove for my write-up and for the viewers/readers.

DEFINITION OF EQUALITY

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Equality

Political equality, in which all members of a society are of equal standing

Consociationalism, in which an ethnically, religiously, or linguistically divided state functions by cooperation of each group’s elites
Egalitarianism, a trend of thought that favours equality for all people
Equal opportunity, a stipulation that all people should be treated similarly
Equality of outcome, in which the general conditions of people’s lives are similar
For specific groups:
Gender equality
Racial equality
Equality Party (disambiguation), several political parties

Social equality, in which all people within a group have the same status, a form of social justice.

Because of my work am going to specify on the one that pertains to my study:

political equality
egalitarianism
equal opportunity
gender equality
social equality

POLITICAL EQUALITY-

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Political_egalitarianism

Political egalitarianism is where members of a society are of equal standing in terms of political power or influence. A founding principle of various forms of democracy, political egalitarianism was an idea which was supported by Thomas Jefferson and it is a concept similar to moral reciprocity and legal equality. The idea suggests all citizens of a certain country must be treated equally solely depending on their citizenship status, not on their race, gender, religion and how clever or how rich they are. Equal citizenship constitute the core of political egalitarianism. This is expressed in such principles as one-person/one-vote, equality before the law and equal rights of free speech.

EGALITARIANISM

According to Wikipedia

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Egalitarianism

Egalitarianism (from French égal, meaning ‘equal’), or equalitarianism, is a school of thought within political philosophy that prioritizes equality for all people. Egalitarian doctrines are generally characterized by the idea that all humans are equal in fundamental worth or moral status.

According to the Merriam-Webster Dictionary

The term has two distinct definitions in modern English, namely either as a political doctrine that all people should be treated as equals and have the same political, economic, social and civil rights, or as a social philosophy advocating the removal of economic inequalities among people, economic egalitarianism, or the decentralization of power. Some sources define egalitarianism as the point of view that equality reflects the natural state of humanity.

EQUAL OPPORTUNITY

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Equal_opportunity

Equal opportunity is a state of fairness in which job applicants are treated similarly, unhampered by artificial barriers or prejudices or preferences, except when particular distinctions can be explicitly justified. The intent is that the important jobs in an organization should go to the people who are most qualified – persons most likely to perform ably in a given task – and not go to persons for reasons deemed arbitrary or irrelevant, such as circumstances of birth, upbringing, having well-connected relatives or friends, religion, sex, ethnicity, race, caste, or involuntary personal attributes such as disability, age, gender identity, or sexual orientation.

Equal opportunities is interpreted as being judged by ability, which is compatible with a free market economy. Relevant problems are horizontal inequality − the inequality of two persons of same origin and ability and differing opportunities given to individuals − such as in (education) or by inherited capital.

GENDER EQUALITY

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gender_equality

Gender equality, also known as sexual equality or equality of the sexes, is the state of equal ease of access to resources and opportunities regardless of gender, including economic participation and decision-making; and the state of valuing different behaviors, aspirations and needs equally, regardless of gender. Gender equality is the goal, while gender neutrality and gender equity are practices and ways of thinking that help in achieving the goal.

UNICEF says gender equality “means that women and men, and girls and boys, enjoy the same rights, resources, opportunities and protections. It does not require that girls and boys, or women and men, be the same, or that they be treated exactly alike.

SOCIAL EQUALITY

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Social_equality

Social equality is a state of affairs in which all people within a specific society or isolated group have the same status in possibly all respects, possibly including civil rights, freedom of speech, property rights and equal access to certain social goods and social services. However, it may also include health equality, economic equality and other social securities. Social equality requires the absence of legally enforced social class or caste boundaries and the absence of discrimination motivated by an inalienable part of a person’s identity. For example, sex, gender, race, age, sexual orientation, origin, caste or class, income or property, language, religion, convictions, opinions, health or disability must absolutely not result in unequal treatment under the law and should not reduce opportunities unjustifiably.

DETAILED EXPLANATION

I will start my point against such argument from these men saying such statement:

“Women and men are different. They are not equal. There are obvious underlying biological differences between the two sexes”

This is a superficial fact – that men and women are biologically different and have different general abilities, and therefore not “equal” to one another in the physiological sense. If this is the reason for men to refute women’s equality, and tag them as being misandrist because women can’t get equal opportunities with them base on the physical and biological different then it is wrong.

When people/men talk about being “equal”, they don’t care about the physical differences. The word “EQUAL” MEANS EQUAL TREATMENT BEFORE THE LAW, EQUALITY OF OPPORTUNITY, AND EQUAL CONSIDERATION OF INTERESTS. So, most people/men completely misses the point of equality. I guess most men/people are totally wrong in this aspect of equality.

The following are proves against the argument that feminist cannot attain equality with men:

PROVE 1 (FROM HER BOOK)

According to a popular literature book “”” WE SHOULD ALL BE FEMINIST “””

FEMINIST Adichie Chimanmanda Ngozi she says in her book:

“”””” My own definition is a feminist is a man or a woman who says, yes, there’s a problem with gender as it is today and we must fix it, we must do better. All of us, women and men, must do better.”””””

PROVE 2(FROM HER BOOK)

According to a popular literature book “”” WE SHOULD ALL BE FEMINIST “””

FEMINIST Adichie Chimanmanda Ngozi she says in her book:

“”””” Men and women are different. We have different hormones and different sexual organs and different biological abilities—women can have babies, men cannot. Men have more testosterone and are, in general, physically stronger than women. A man and a woman are doing the same job, with the same qualifications, and the man is paid more because he is a man. So in a literal way, men rule the world. This made sense a thousand years ago. Because human beings lived then in a world in which physical strength was the most important attribute for survival; the physically stronger person was more likely to lead. And men in general are physically stronger. (There are of course many exceptions.) Today, we live in a vastly different world. The person more qualified to lead is not the physically stronger person. It is the more intelligent, the more knowledgeable, the more creative, more innovative. And there are no hormones for those attributes. A man is as likely as a woman to be intelligent, innovative, creative. We have evolved. But our ideas of gender have not evolved very much. “””””

PROVE 3 (FROM HER BOOK)

According to a popular literature book “”” WE SHOULD ALL BE FEMINIST “””

FEMINIST Adichie Chimanmanda Ngozi she says in her book:

“””””” Some people ask: “Why the word feminist? Why not just say you are a believer in human rights, or something like that?” Because that would be dishonest. Feminism is, of course, part of human rights in general—but to choose to use the vague expression human rights is to deny the specific and particular problem of gender. It would be a way of pretending that it was not women who have, for centuries, been excluded. It would be a way of denying that the problem of gender targets women. That the problem was not about being human, but specifically about being a female human. For centuries, the world divided human beings into two groups and then proceeded to exclude and oppress one group. It is only fair that the solution to the problem acknowledge that. Some men feel threatened by the idea of feminism. This comes, I think, from the insecurity triggered by how boys are brought up, how their sense of self-worth is diminished if they are not “naturally” in charge as men. “”””””

PROVE 4 (FROM HER BOOK)

According to a popular literature book “”” DEAR IJEAWELE OR A FEMINIST MANIFESTO IN FIFTEEN SUGGESTIONS “””

FEMINIST Adichie Chimamanda Ngozi she says in her book:

From the sixth Suggestion

“”””””“Teach her, too, to question the idea of women as a special species. I once heard an American politician, in his bid to show his support for women, speak of how women should be ‘revered’ and ‘championed’ – a sentiment that is all too common. Tell Chizalum that women actually don’t need to be championed and revered; they just need to be treated as equal human beings. There is a patronizing undertone to the idea of women needing to be ‘championed and revered’ because they are women. It makes me think of chivalry, and the premise of chivalry is female weakness. “”””””

PROVE 5 (FROM HER BOOK)

According to a popular literature book “”” DEAR IJEAWELE OR A FEMINIST MANIFESTO IN FIFTEEN SUGGESTIONS “””

FEMINIST Adichie Chimanmanda Ngozi she says in her book:

From the second Suggestion

“””””” Do it together. Remember in primary school we learned that a verb was a ‘doing’ word? Well, a father is as much a verb as a mother. Chudi should do everything that biology allows – which is everything but breastfeeding. Sometimes mothers, so conditioned to be all and do all, are complicit in diminishing the role of fathers. You might think that Chudi will not bathe her exactly as you’d like, that he might not wipe her bum as perfectly as you do. But so what? What is the worst that can happen? She won’t die at the hands of her father. Seriously. He loves her.

It’s good for her to be cared for by her father. So look away, arrest your perfectionism, still your socially conditioned sense of duty. Share child care equally. ‘Equally’ of course depends on you both, and you will have to work it out, paying equal attention to each person’s needs. It does not have to mean a literal fifty-fifty or a day-by-day score-keeping but you’ll know when the child-care work is equally shared. You’ll know by your lack of resentment. Because when there is true equality, resentment does not exist. ””””””

PROVE 6 (FROM SITE/INTERNET-TALK)

I will backed it up with a powerful statement made by FEMINIST/WRITER/ CHIMAMANDA NGOZI ADICHIE where she mentioned “”””FEMINISM“”””

For further reading here is the link to convince you:

https://pen.org/press-clip/chimamanda-ngozi-adichie-on-the-world-of-african-literature/

FEMINIST/WRITER/ CHIMAMANDA NGOZI ADICHIE speech:

“” At the TED conference in 2013, Ms Adichie gave a now-famous talk titled, “We Should All Be Feminists.” (The singer Beyoncé quoted it in her song “Flawless.”) “My version of feminism means acknowledging that women have and continue to have gotten the bad end of things, politically and socially, all over the world,” she says. “Feminism means not only acknowledging that, but wanting to make it better.””

PROVE 7 (FROM SITE/INTERNET-SPEECH)

Here a powerful statement made by FEMINIST/WRITER/ CHIMAMANDA NGOZI ADICHIE where she mentioned “”””FEMINISM“”””

For further reading here is the link to the SPEECH convince you.

https://time.com/3921492/chimamanda-ngozi-adichie-graduation-commencement-wellesley/

FEMINIST/WRITER/ CHIMAMANDA NGOZI ADICHIE

IN HER SPEECH SHE SAYS-

“””””” Recently a feminist organization kindly nominated me for an important prize in a country that will remain unnamed. I was very pleased. I’ve been fortunate to have received a few prizes so far and I quite like them especially when they come with shiny presents. To get this prize, I was required to talk about how important a particular European feminist woman writer had been to me. Now the truth was that I had never managed to finish this feminist writer’s book. It did not speak to me. It would have been a lie to claim that she had any major influence on my thinking. The truth is that I learned so much more about feminism from watching the women traders in the market in Nsukka where I grew up, than from reading any seminal feminist text. I could have said that this woman was important to me, and I could have talked the talk, and I could have been given the prize and a shiny present.

But I didn’t.

Because I had begun to ask myself what it really means to wear this FEMINIST label so publicly.

Just as I asked myself after excerpts of my feminism speech were used in a song by a talented musician whom I think some of you might know. I thought it was a very good thing that the word ‘feminist’ would be introduced to a new generation.

But I was startled by how many people, many of whom were academics, saw something troubling, even menacing, in this. It was as though feminism was supposed to be an elite little cult, with esoteric rites of membership.

But it shouldn’t. Feminism should be an inclusive party. Feminism should be a party full of different feminisms.

And so, class of 2015, please go out there and make Feminism a big raucous inclusive party. “”””””

PROVE 8 (FROM SITE/INTERNET)

I will backed it up with a powerful statement made by FEMINIST/WRITER/ CHIMAMANDA NGOZI ADICHIE where she mentioned “”””FEMINISM“”””

For further reading here is the link to the SPEECH convince you.

https://time.com/3921492/chimamanda-ngozi-adichie-graduation-commencement-wellesley/

FEMINIST/WRITER/ CHIMAMANDA NGOZI ADICHIE

IN HER SPEECH SHE SAYS-

“”””” I am lucky that my writing has given me a platform that I choose to use to talk about things that I care about, and I have said a few things that have not been so popular with a number of people. I have been told to shut up about certain things – such as my position on the equal rights of gay people on the continent of Africa, such as my deeply held belief that men and women are completely equal. I don’t speak to provoke. I speak because I think our time on earth is short and each moment that we are not our truest selves, each moment we pretend to be what we are not, each moment we say what we do not mean because we imagine that is what somebody wants us to say, then we are wasting our time on earth. “””””

PROVE 9 (COMMENTS/THOUGHTS FROM SITE/INTERNET)

Here is a collection of comments made by individual based on the linking of feminism with misandry. Here is the link to the site where the comment are been made for easy understanding of the topic.

Stop! Feminists are Not All Man-Haters

https://whenwomeninspire.com/2018/05/07/all-feminists-are-not-haters/

Out of 127 thoughts/comments on the topic “STOP! FEMINISTS ARE NOT ALL MAN-HATERS “posted by CHRISTY B, I was able to get 20 thoughts /comments that correlate with my topic/articles. Here are the 20 thoughts/comments:

1. ALI

JULY 12, 2018 AT 11:29 PM

One fundamental problem is that feminism is asking for change. If you are benefiting from an inequality, you are not going to see the need for change, and you are quite likely to resist the change. At the same time as you say there is no need for change your resistance to change is confirming that you don’t want to give up your advantage. So I suppose we have to understand this understandable resistance.

It is very hard for a man and a woman to discuss sexual inequality. Just as it is hard for a white person and a black person to discuss racism. One has more skin in the game, and has been hurt by this inequality, and the other hasn’t, so struggles to see it. It is important that the hurt side helps the non-hurt side to see what is happening every day to them in a myriad of ways. The seemingly insignificant things: the song lyrics, and portrayal in tv comedies, and assumptions that a Dr is a man, the lack of dynamic and go-getting role-models.

Men are not the enemy, but they do need help in seeing what the problems are, just as white people need help in seeing what the problems are. I am in a good relationship with a man who would now identify as a feminist, but he, like pretty much all men, initially mocked feminism because he misunderstood the need for it. Now he totally gets it, and calls me out when I make an assumption or limit the expectations on myself.

2. D. WALLACE PEACH

JULY 10, 2018 AT 11:44 AM

Great post, Christy. I agree that a reasoned and measured approach tends to keep people from getting defensive, and when they’re not defensive, they can be more open-minded. My husband became a feminist when he realized I was making 10% less in pay than my male peers. The biases impact everyone, not just women. We are a long long way from equal rights and opportunities. The fact that women in the US may lose their right to make their own healthcare and family planning choices is an example of how fragile our rights are. Men would never expect or put up with their rights being so curtailed. Keep speaking up, my friend.

3. PATRICK STORIES

JUNE 25, 2018 AT 8:26 AM

You said something about feminist.

I love girls who are feminist.

I feel blessed by your writing right now.

I found delight love and joy in what you just wrote about women. Though am a man but a women gave birth to me. So I respect then a lot.

I will love my own part of the contribution here and the feminist I have come across.

Here is the little summary:

I asked a Muslim girl who is my friend on Facebook, an Algerian girl. She is a blogger also. After a long chat we discussed some recent issues about women in the Society and likewise chinanmanda adichie a popular feminist in USA(the writer of purple hibiscus)

So I throw up a question to her

Question- Can you be a Feminist?

Her answer (reply)

One thing you should know about feminism is that there are many kinds of feminisms. Not all movements have the same goals and views. I can be a feminist. I might agree with some feminists like Adichie because they speak of troubles women go through in certain places and it makes sense. What I don’t agree with, though, is being a fanatical feminist, those who are fighting just for the sake of fighting. There needs to be a cause and as a Muslim woman, I fully believe that my religion has covered all what a woman needs to have. Islam assures all the rights of women and preserves them very well. So all what we need is to follow the rules of our conviction and work in accordance with them. And then we wouldn’t need a feminist movement at all. That’s my belief

Latina Khadidja

Again such a beautiful writing.

I Enjoy such post about feminists. Keep the good work.

#PATRICKSTORIES

Peace ✌and Love ❤

4. MYWIFEISABLACKBELT

JUNE 14, 2018 AT 1:33 PM

I really liked this post! And it seems we have very similar views on equality! I do not believe men and women should be “forced” to be the same. And I don’t think the fact that we are not the same is a problem – on the contrary, diversity is a strength. And exactly as you say, I strongly believe in equal rights and opportunity for all, regardless of gender (or skin colour, ethnicity etc). I believe everyone should be respected as a unique individual and not judged on the basis of being a woman or man, black or white etc. But I have never seen myself as a feminist. This is because most of the feminists I have encountered – in real life and online – have not shared the beliefs and values I described above. They have instead showed contempt, anger and even hatred towards men in general. And they have based most solutions on the principle of dividing all humans into different subgroups based on gender and skin colour and then proclaimed that every individual should be judged and treaded according to which gender and skin colour subgroup he or she “belongs to”: 1) the privileged guilty and evil oppressors who must be brought down, or 2) the innocent poor victims who must always receive special support and help.

I know that this is not at all true about all feminists. Obviously you are a proof of that. And I wish all feminists were like you. Not the least because, as you point out, there are still inequalities, stereotypes and problems in society – many affect women more and some affect men more. I have personally experienced one aspect of this as my wife is a professional martial artist and self defence teacher. As you can see, I even started blogging about this! 🙂

5. A TALL BADASS FEMINIST

JUNE 6, 2018 AT 10:30 AM

I’m a feminist and I hate it when people think that we are man haters! Feminism is the belief in gender quality, for males and females.

6. LISTENINGFLOWER

MAY 31, 2018 AT 6:58 AM

You right! Some women are angry but so are men. I honestly want equal rights & I don’t openly say it in every aspect of my life but I will point out rather forcefully that I will not be treated differently & that I command respect from both men & women. I have a opinion & would like it to be heard like every other persons at the table. Your right people have stereotyped feminism. I honestly believe the people (both men & women) that say these things are unknowing of what it means to be treated as equal, & have not yet experienced the same treatment.

7. ZETA

MAY 19, 2018 AT 12:02 AM

Great post! I did a post like this myself, and I was shocked that the first comment I got was trying to tell me that feminism is not a stance for equality. (Thankfully I put him right). I’m so glad you did this post because there are surprisingly so many people confused about what feminism is, and the more posts like this that are out there, the better. Well done!

8. LINNEA TANNER

MAY 16, 2018 AT 12:17 PM

Thank you, Christy, for sharing your thoughts about feminism. I also consider myself a feminist, but it is in celebration of what women has and can contribute to society as partners with men. It’s not about hate, but about mutual respect for each other. It’s unfortunate the label has received such a bad name.

9. BAYDREAMER

MAY 10, 2018 AT 4:01 PM

What a great post and well said, Christy. I agree in that being a feminist doesn’t mean being a man-hater. It’s about equal rights and opportunities, as you conveyed. With that being said, things won’t always be equal between men and women because of the physical differences and other factors. It’s like being in a relationship. It won’t always be 50/50. It’s give and take on both sides.

Regarding voices, it’s too bad that louder volumes are attention-grabbers, too, but I can also see a softer, firm, confident voice getting the message across, as well. I’m on the fence with this, but as we’ve grown up to learn, anger isn’t the answer. Shouldn’t it be “our” desire and goal to calm things down in the human race? I truly understand, though, why some women feel they have to raise their voices, otherwise, they may not be heard. It’s still truly astonishing, the mentality that women should be less than men in any circumstance, be it job position, salaries, etc. May it be someday (sooner than later) that both women and men can be respected equally…❤

10. SOPHIE E TALLIS

MAY 10, 2018 AT 5:28 AM

Great post and very thought provoking, thank you! For myself I’m a feminist too and no those negative stereotypes do not apply to me or any of the feminists I know. One of the reasons feminism has developed a bad rap in some quarters is also because of inaccurate propaganda and a backlash by those that don’t really understand what feminism is. It never was about hating men or hating anything, it was about equal rights. Yes it’s true that feminism probably means something different to everyone, but one over-riding fact still remains – that feminism was and is simply about EQUALITY. That’s it, equality. It’s not a scary thing, its simply about having men and women treated with equal respect, getting equal pay for the same job, having an equal voice in society and having equal freedoms. That’s it. It’s not threatening anyone, just as equal rights should never be dependent on the colour of your skin, your ethnicity, religion or lack of, sexual orientation, cultural background, etc., it also should never be dependent on your gender. If women are angry about not having equal rights, that is not only understandable but should never be misinterpreted as hysteria or hatred, the same way that the civil rights movement were understandably angry that people of colour were being denied basic human rights because of the colour of their skin. As a wider society, we all have a part to play in ensuring that ALL people have equal rights and equal pay, so no, it’s got nothing to do with hate just about equality and fairness. 🙂

11. TINA FRISCO

MAY 9, 2018 AT 3:11 PM

Great post, Christy! It’s interesting how some people equate being a feminist with being a misandrist. This phenomenon occurs whenever someone is afraid to stand in their own power. They feel guilt, shame, fear, and anger for not doing so. Thus, when they see a minority person standing in their own power, they ridicule them in an attempt to make themselves feel better. They skew the truth; and the sad is that they don’t even know what the truth is. The flip side of this is people calling themselves feminists when they are, in fact, misandrists. It gives feminists a bad rep. Add to this that anger is often mistaken for hatred, especially when spoken by a woman who identifies as a feminist. The culprit here is fear; and it wears an ugly face. Hugs for sharing this wonderful post, my friend ❤️

12. TRICIA DRAMMEH

MAY 9, 2018 AT 3:57 AM

Great article, Christy. I’ve always thought of feminism as equality between men and women, not as women being better than men as some people think.

13. AMY CAUDILL

MAY 8, 2018 AT 5:47 PM

Christy, I agree entirely. Wanting to be treated fairly and being respected by the opposite sex does not, should not mean we hate men. Perhaps some women use the push for equal rights as an excuse to express their own resentments and aggressions, which is not necessarily a bad thing, but it is a shame when the words and actions of a few outspoken individuals become a stereotype for an entire movement. I believe that in order for women to truly receive fair treatment, we must insist on such for everyone. After all, “equal” can only truly be applied across the board, not to one area or group irrespective of the rest.

14. GALLANTLY, GAL

MAY 8, 2018 AT 2:09 PM

Beautifully said. I agree that they took the word “feminism” and turned it into something with a negative connotation–and we need to take it back. It’s a word of strength. I think it’s partly from women who truly are angry and hateful but also from men who try to belittle our stance and turn us into un-women. That’s why when I see men proudly call themselves feminists, I think it’s sweet, and I really appreciate their support. It’s not just a woman thing, after all. It’s a human thing.

15. LISTENINGTOMYLIFE7

MAY 8, 2018 AT 11:05 AM

You clearly state the separation between feminism and man-hating. I’ve been a feminist since the sixties and have evolved through anger to sadness and compassion for men who have also been formed in a gender specific world. At this time in my life I see the defenses of so many men and women as fear of change. I look at my activism of the 70’s and 80’s and see the same issues today. I do have hope that more women are speaking out and more men are getting it. thanks for a thought provoking piece.

16. CRIS

MAY 8, 2018 AT 10:44 AM

Christy, this is so well stated. In some circles, feminism has become a dirty word, precisely because of what you describe. I try to use the opportunity to remind people that, at its core, feminism is about women having equal rights, period, and that if you believe women should be able to vote, own property, and have access to the same jobs as men, being paid the same for doing the same work (and not be harassed simply because we’re women)… then you are indeed a feminist. And perhaps more mainstream women need to be bold about making that kind of statement to re-normalize the label.

17. JULIE DE ROHAN

MAY 7, 2018 AT 11:34 PM

I feel that labelling feminists as man-haters is done simply to discredit. That way, the message can be easily dismissed and no discussion has to be entered into, which says a lot about the person dishing out the label. I also think that sometimes we confuse anger with aggression, which is why women are often afraid of it. For me, anger is best expressed assertively – I love to hear women speak with confidence, passion and clarity, which is exactly what you have done in this fantastic post. Thanks, Christy.

18. JOANNA LOVINGER

MAY 7, 2018 AT 11:08 PM

Totally agree with what you said. I’ve always thought people who confuse feminists with man-haters are dumbing things down deliberately to change the subject. The other two ideas that people get confused are hate and anger. I can be very angry about injustice, for example. But I can also be a loving and caring person who doesn’t hate anyone.

19. TIENNY THE STORYTELLER

MAY 7, 2018 AT 10:14 PM

This is one of the issue for feminists being grouped together as man-hater. Some are not man-haters. I can understand the reason the feminists have gone through great sufferings with men who bullied and even humiliate them. However, there are also men who treats women well.

20. KELSEYBEAGOALG

MAY 7, 2018 AT 6:31 PM

Yes, yes, yes, YES. Well said, Christy. You’ve got a feminist sister, here! And I agree 100% with all that you’ve said. It’s about equality, not putting men down. Because, as you mentioned, there are some pretty amazing men out there, just like there are some pretty amazing women out there.

Great work, and wonderful writing. You hit the nail on the head yet again, my friend.

PROVE 10 (FROM SITE/INTERNET)

In these last prove is a collection of sites that speak about the difference between feminist and misandrist. For better understanding and exploitation of the topic/articles you are free to click on the link below

1. 5 Reasons Why So Many People Believe Feminism Hates Men and Why They’re Not True

https://www.itspronouncedmetrosexual.com/2012/12/reasons-people-believe-feminism-hates-men/

2. What Is Feminism, And Why Do So Many Women And Men Hate It?

https://www.forbes.com/sites/kathycaprino/2017/03/08/what-is-feminism-and-why-do-so-many-women-and-men-hate-it/#4b90f2387e8e

3. Stop! Feminists are Not All Man-Haters

https://whenwomeninspire.com/2018/05/07/all-feminists-are-not-haters/

PROVE 11 (FROM FACEBOOK CHAT)

Here is the little summary of our chat on Facebook as evidence

I asked a Muslim girl who is my friend on Facebook, an Algerian girl. She is a blogger also. After a long chat we discussed some recent issues about women in the Society and likewise CHIMAMANDA ADICHIE NGOZI a popular feminist in USA. The writer of theses popular books

WE SHOULD ALL BE FEMINIST
DEAR IJEAWELE OR A FEMINIST MANIFESTO IN FIFTEEN SUGGESTIONS

PURPLE HABISCUS

So I personally throw up a question to her

QUESTION- CAN YOU BE A FEMINIST?

HER ANSWER (REPLY)-

Latina Khadidja

Facebook contact -Latina Khadidja

Her website- https://abookworldweb.wordpress.com/

SECOND ARGUMENT (men believe the man-hating from feminist is based on the fight for authority)

As I went further in getting another statement made by some people/men concerning the idea of linking feminism and misandry is the reference from the bible. Men feel women should be submissive to their husband. Men/people feel women don’t have the right to authority and power so they feel feminist hate men for such thing based on the bible reference about authority. Again they forgot the idea of feminism is all about equality not about hatred of menfolk’s as being assumed by them.

Here is a statement some men used in justifying the idea of linking feminism and misandry using the references from the bible

1. The Holy Bible in 1 Corinthians 14:34-35 states that “as in all the congregations of the saints, women should remain silent in the churches. They are not allowed to speak, but must be in submission, as the Law says. If they want to inquire about something, they should ask their own husbands at home; for it is disgraceful for a woman to speak in the church.”

2. Ephesians 5:22–24 says the following: “Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Saviour. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.”

For better understanding of these argument am going to define the meaning of authority from different sources and with links beneath it as prove for my write-up and for the viewers/readers.

DEFINITION OF AUTHORITY

ACCORDING TO WIKIPEDIA

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Authority

Authority is the legitimate power which one person or group possesses and practices over another.[1] A civil state usually makes this formal by way of a judicial branch and an executive branch of government.

ACCORDING TO CAMBRIDGE DICTIONARY

https://dictionary.cambridge.org/dictionary/english/authority

The moral or legal right or ability to control.
A group of people with official responsibility for a particular area of activity.
The power to control or demand obedience from others.
The official power to make decisions for other people or to tell them what they must do.
Official permission or the legal right to do something.
The ability to influence other people and make them respect you, especially because you are confident or have a lot of knowledge.

DETAILED EXPLANATION

Here is an exposition of Genesis chapter 1-3, I hope to vividly point out some major flaws and inconsistencies about some people/men about linking feminism and misandry so I can prove to them that the bible gave women authority since men are naming feminism as misandrist based on the idea that they don’t possess these authority menfolk’s have.

Here are the following proves to my above point on authority and power:

PROVE 1 (DOMINION, AUTHORITY, EVE’S IDENTITY AND AUTHORITY)

I found Genesis 1:26-27 interesting. Verse 26 does say “let them have dominion” some of the emphasis is also elaborated upon in verse 28. It says that God blessed them and said to them, that they are to subdue and rule over the earth. The creation mandate is given to man and woman together. There is no hint of distinct roles or job descriptions here. Adam and Eve are commanded together to co-rule the earth.

An additional point is that in Genesis 1:26-28, there are only 2 authority structures: God over all creation, and man and woman’s joint authority over the earth. Their dominion and authority was directed towards creation, and not toward each other. Remember that this was before the fall.

Again, there is nothing in Genesis 1 and 2 to indicate that Adam was the responsible one, the leader, or authority figure. There was joint authority and they were to co-rule the earth as God’s representatives.

EVE’S IDENTITY AND AUTHORITY

In Genesis 3:20, Adam calls his wife by the name “Eve” for the first time, because he now understands that she will be the “mother of all the living.” Yet I have seldom heard anyone say that being the “mother of all the living” was Eve’s defining role.

It seems that Eve had more than one role and that her roles changed as circumstances changed.

Most people have many roles in life, and these change as our circumstances change and as we go through different life stages. Nevertheless, some Christians think that Eve and, by extension, all women are fundamentally defined to be the auxiliaries, or subordinate helpers, of men.

Furthermore, the scriptures give us no reason to think that Eve’s station in life was marked by a one-sided help or service to her husband, or that Adam’s station in life was to receive his wife’s help without also helping her.

Genesis 1:26-28 indicates that men and women were created to work together to do what is necessary to act as God’s regents, which includes ruling the earth and having dominion over the animals.

In Genesis 1, men and women are given the exact same commission from God, and they have an identical status, authority, and function. Gender roles are not mentioned before the fall. In Genesis 1, men and women have an identical status, authority and purpose.

PROVE 2 (PRIMOGENITURE NATURE)

For better understanding of prove 2, here is the definition of primogeniture-

ACCORDING TO ENCYCLOPEDIA

https://www.encyclopedia.com/social-sciences-and-law/law/law/primogeniture

Primogeniture has two closely related meanings: (1) a principle of seniority and authority whereby siblings are ranked according to their ages, with the eldest coming first; and (2) a principle of inheritance, in which the firstborn child receives all or his parents’ most significant and valuable property upon their death.

ACCORDING TO MERRIAM-WEBSTER DICTIONARY

https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/primogeniture

1: the state of being the firstborn of the children of the same parents

2: an exclusive right of inheritance belonging to the eldest son

Because Adam was created first, some see this as evidence of the man having special status and privilege (primogeniture). Yet, there is no evidence of primogeniture until a considerable time after creation, moreover nothing primogeniture during the creation account. Furthermore, it was after the creation we started seeing primogeniture nature using those born later such as Isaac, Jacob, Joseph, and David.

PROVE 3 (AUTHORITY AND NAMING ARE MUTUALLY EXCLUSIVE)

Some will also state that because Adam named Eve that this shows him having some special authority. However, in the Bible, the act of naming does not necessarily imply authority. For example, Hagar (the Egyptian slave of Abraham and Sarah) gave God a name! Does that mean Hagar had authority over God? I don’t think so. And both men and women named children in the Old Testament. There are 25 instances of women naming children, and twenty by men. If this demonstrates authority, it is a joint or shared authority by men and women.

PROVE 4 (AUTHORITY AND POWER)

According to a popular literature book “”” DEAR IJEAWELE OR A FEMINIST MANIFESTO IN FIFTEEN SUGGESTIONS “””

FEMINIST Adichie Chimanmanda Ngozi she says in her book:

From the fourth Suggestion

“”” But here is a sad truth: our world is full of men and women who do not like powerful women. We have been so conditioned to think of power as male that a powerful woman is an aberration. ”””

THIRD ARGUMENT (statistics prove that women stay at home more)

Men believe the man-hating/act of misandrist from feminist is based on the fact that statistics prove that women stay at home more so they try to fight to work like men in terms of equality to avoid been at home

Another annoying claim I need to tackle is the fact that some men still give assumptions as stated below:

“”””The statistics say that hardly any stay-at-home parents are male. The vast majority of them are women, which is good because it shows that most women know their role. It is important for women to understand their role as homemakers and child carers. It is important for the good of society. ”””””

This ideas claim by men/people is a fallacy and totally incorrect. From what am seeing now, am able to bring out some funny points some men claim concerning the idea of linking feminism and misandry together.

Point 1

The statistics say that hardly any stay-at-home parents are male. The vast majority of them are women, which is good because it shows that most women know their role.

Point 2

It is important for women to understand their role as homemakers and childcarers. It is important for the good of society.

These points I guess are totally absurd to me. Starting with

POINT 1

“The statistics say that hardly any stay-at-home parents are male. The vast majority of them are women, which is good because it shows that most women know their role. “

Any women can stay in home base on some personal decision or some cogent reasons best known to her. So women staying at home is not enough reason to say that is a role of a women. Again that is not enough reason to prove that they got tired and they hate men who work.

A woman can believe all this and still say: Given the actual real situation of my life, they choose to stay at home. The “why” and “how” of her life situation is still based on individual choices. But it doesn’t really matter when it comes to what makes sense for her. This is about individual choice. Not social/societals influence on the role of a women being at home.

Finally staying at home is not a point from menfolk’s to link feminism and misandry together.

POINT 2

“” It is important for women to understand their role as homemakers and childcarers. It is important for the good of society.””

These men feel that women have special role of taking care of children and also homemakers. So the men folk has labelled such as the work or duty as a women, so they are afraid that if feminist rise up and fight for their right, that they will not be any duty for women. They feel women got tired of staying at home and hate men for placing them in that role. So they feel feminist hate men and the idea of linking feminist and misandrist come in place.

Society has set a lot of duties for men and women alike and it’s even painful to see that in a children’s textbook, the duties of a wife are “to cook for the family, to bring up the children, homemakers and clean the house.” While men are “the head of the house and they go out to work”

It’s a huge shame in this 21 century that men still gender bias women base on homely duties.

For me personally, I kick against the fact that women are weak and less important in the society (female subordination- This female subordination which I termed oppression, subjugation and subjection has made women become less in the society) thereby placing them as homemakers. We are equal. No body have the right to detect if a person is less or weak. Society has made it look like that. Even some of the women has accepted this fact that they are weak and less important because they have nothing to offer but instead stay at home and become homemakers and childcarers.

Because of this it gave rise to gender equality that is been declared and agitated by feminist.

According to a popular literature book “”” DEAR IJEAWELE OR A FEMINIST MANIFESTO IN FIFTEEN SUGGESTIONS “””

FEMINIST Adichie Chimanmanda Ngozi she says in her book:

“”””””“Teach her, too, to question the idea of women as a special species. I once heard an American politician, in his bid to show his support for women, speak of how women should be ‘revered’ and ‘championed’ – a sentiment that is all too common. Tell Chizalum that women actually don’t need to be championed and revered; they just need to be treated as equal human beings. There is a patronizing undertone to the idea of women needing to be ‘championed and revered’ because they are women. It makes me think of chivalry, and the premise of chivalry is female weakness. “”””””

For me personally, Patrick — I strongly believe in equal rights and opportunity for all, regardless of gender (or skin colour, ethnicity etc.). I believe everyone should be respected as a unique individual and not judged on the basis of being a woman or man, black or white etc.

My point is that we are all people and not defined by preconceived notions of delegated roles assigned by gender (especially upbringing of a child) which some men termed as traditional roles.There are so many successful women who have achieved things that I can only dream of, and it matters not to me if she is married, single, divorced, young, old or strong and loud or soft and gentle. Their accomplishments added to our world.

We have various women in our world today who have accomplish much in term of education, science and technology. Whether married, single, divorce, old and young. They all add benefit to the society at large. No one should be neglected base on gender.

Putting women down to the dust, shows that women don’t have values and this lead to gender role perception which the society still practice. As an individual who support GENDER EQUALITY and agitate for HUMAN RIGHT, I feel women have suffer a lot in this patriarchy based society.

The idea of gender role (cooking, domestic, child bringing and chores are meant for women) I don’t agree with it personally.

Most of my female friends (and many of my male friends) would self-identify as feminists. Some work, some stay at home to care for the children (yes, some men stay at home with the kids, too!). There is no contradiction there. Women can stay at home based on these factors:

Individual choice vs. societal influence
Making money vs. controlling money

Individual choice vs. societal influence–

Feminism generally pushes for equal opportunities. It does not demand that a woman work or it demands that a woman stay at home.

Being a housewife is not necessarily oppressing yourself. I personally think it is individual choice, if you look at these traditional housewife roles, fully aware of the implications, and decide you want to do it because that’s what you want to do.

With that being said, you can be a feminist no matter what your living situation is because it’s a movement. You can go out and work 70 hours a week with no family and be anti-oppression and pro-social justice. You can scrub floors and stay at home to make dinner for your children/ kids. You can be poor. You can be rich.

As long as you’re aware of your privilege and your marginalization and you advocate for oppression on many levels to end, you can be a damn good feminist regardless of what path you’ve chosen in life. If you are self-identify as a feminist, you almost certainly believe that women shouldn’t be forced to stay at home.

You also probably believe that societal influences or social conventions have place women to stay at home in various ways—e.g., signaling that childcare is for women, having worse career options open for women, offering better maternal leave than paternal leave, etc. This is all about societal influence or social conventions.

As an extreme example, a woman in the 1950s hasn’t had access to the same career opportunities that her husband has. But given that her husband earns 5x what she does, or given that she just happens to enjoy spending time with the children more than her husband, it makes a lot more sense for her to stay at home. There is nothing like feminism attached to sit about that decision. It’s just about individual choice.

Making money vs. controlling money

Moreover, her choosing to stay at home—to not collect a salary—does not mean that she is submitting control to her husband. I know plenty of men who are the sole/primary breadwinners as well as a few women who are. They do not “control” the money. Money is a team effort. The breadwinner may collect the salary, but their partner at home contributes as well. I do know a few couples where, in practice, one partner has more control over the money. This has to do with the dynamics of their own situation—one partner being more of a better planner. It has no particular correlation with who’s earning the money.

The following are the 10 backups to counter the idea/notion of linking feminism and misandry together based on the idea of statistics of women in the house is more than men

PROVE 1 (FROM HER BOOK)

Here is a little draft from our renowned feminist.

According to a popular literature book “”” DEAR IJEAWELE OR A FEMINIST MANIFESTO IN FIFTEEN SUGGESTIONS “””

FEMINIST ADICHIE CHIMANMANDA NGOZI she says in her book:

SECOND SUGGESTION

It’s good for her to be cared for by her father. So look away, arrest your perfectionism, still your socially conditioned sense of duty. Share child care equally. ‘Equally’ of course depends on you both, and you will have to work it out, paying equal attention to each person’s needs. It does not have to mean a literal fifty-fifty or a day-by-day score-keeping but you’ll know when the child-care work is equally shared. You’ll know by your lack of resentment. Because when there is true equality, resentment does not exist. ””””””

PROVE 2 (FROM HER BOOK)

Here is a little draft from our renowned feminist.

According to a popular literature book”“” DEAR IJEAWELE OR A FEMINIST MANIFESTO IN FIFTEEN SUGGESTIONS “””

FEMINIST ADICHIE CHIMANMANDA NGOZI she says in her book:

THIRD SUGGESTION

“”””””“Teach her that the idea of ‘gender roles’ is absolute nonsense. Do not ever tell her that she should or should not do something because she is a girl. ‘Because you are a girl’ is never a reason for anything ever “””””””

PROVE 3 (FROM HER BOOK)

Here is another quote from our own feminist.

FEMINIST ADICHIE CHIMANMANDA NGOZI she says in her book: WE SHOULD ALL BE FEMINIST

——–The knowledge of cooking does not come pre-installed in a vagina. Cooking is learned.

Cooking – domestic work in general – is a life skill that both men and women should ideally have. It is also a skill that can elude both men and women. We also need to question the idea of marriage as a prize to women, because that is the basis of these absurd debates. If we stop conditioning women to see marriage as a prize, then we would have fewer debates about a wife needing to cook in order to earn that prize. It is interesting to me how early the world starts to invent gender roles. ——–

PROVE 4 (FROM HER BOOK)

Another excerpt/draft from her book also about gender role.

FEMINIST ADICHIE CHIMANMANDA NGOZI she says in her book: DEAR IJEAWELE OR A FEMINIST MANIFESTO IN FIFTEEN SUGGESTIONS

THIRD SUGGESTION:

“””””” Gender roles are so deeply conditioned in us that we will often follow them even when they chafe against our true desires, our needs, our happiness. They are very difficult to unlearn, and so it is important to try to make sure that Chizalum rejects them from the beginning. Instead of letting her internalize the idea of gender roles, teach her self-reliance. Tell her that it is important to be able to do for herself and fend for herself. Teach her to try to fix physical things when they break. We are quick to assume girls can’t do many things. Let her try. She might not fully succeed, but let her try. ””””””

PROVE 5 (FROM HER BOOK)

FEMINIST ADICHIE CHIMANMANDA NGOZI she says in her book: WE SHOULD ALL BE FEMINIST

“”””””” I know a woman who hates domestic work, but she pretends that she likes it, because

She has been taught that to be “good wife material,” she has to be—to use that Nigerian word—homely. And then she got married. And her husband’s family began to complain that she had changed. Actually, she had not changed. She just got tired of pretending to be what she was not. The problem with gender is that it prescribes how we should be rather than recognizing how we are. Imagine how much happier we would be, how much freer to be our true individual selves, if we didn’t have the weight of gender expectations. Boys and girls are undeniably different biologically, but socialization exaggerates the differences. And then starts a self-fulfiling process. Take cooking, for example. Today, women in general are more likely to do housework than men— cooking and cleaning.

But why is that? Is it because women are born with a cooking gene or because over years they have been socialized to see cooking as their role? I was going to say that perhaps women are born with a cooking gene until I remembered that the majority of famous cooks in the world—who are given the fancy title of “chef”—are men.

But what matters even more is our attitude, our mind-set. What if, in raising children, we focus on ability instead of gender? What if we focus on interest instead of gender? I know a family who has a son and a daughter, a year apart in age, both brilliant at school. When the boy is hungry, the parents say to the girl, Go and cook Indomie noodles for your brother. The girl doesn’t like to cook Indomie, but she is a girl and she has to. What if the parents, from the beginning, taught both children to cook Indomie? Cooking, by the way, is a useful and practical life skill for a boy to have—I’ve never thought it made much sense to leave such a crucial thing—the ability to nourish oneself—in the hands of others. ””””””’

PROVE 6 (FROM HER BOOK)

According to a popular literature book”“” DEAR IJEAWELE OR A FEMINIST MANIFESTO IN FIFTEEN SUGGESTIONS “””

FEMINIST ADICHIE CHIMANMANDA NGOZI she says in her book:

FIRST SUGGESTION

“”” I have no interest in the debate about women ‘doing it all’ because it is a debate that assumes that care-giving and domestic work are singularly female domains, an idea that I strongly reject. Domestic work and care-giving should be gender-neutral, and we should be asking not whether a woman can ‘do it all’ but how best to support parents in their dual duties at work and at home. ”””

PROVE 7(FROM HER BOOK)

According to a popular literature book“”” DEAR IJEAWELE OR A FEMINIST MANIFESTO IN FIFTEEN SUGGESTIONS “””

FEMINIST ADICHIE CHIMANMANDA NGOZI she says in her book:

SIXTH SUGGESTION

””””” Teach her to ask questions like: what are the things that women cannot do because they are women? Do these things have cultural prestige? If so, why are only men allowed to do the things that have cultural prestige? It is helpful, I think, to use everyday examples. Remember that television commercial we watched in Lagos, where a man cooks and his claps for him? True progress is when she doesn’t clap for him but just reacts to the food itself – she can either praise the food or not praise the food, just as he can praise hers or not praise hers, but what is sexist is that she is praising the fact that he has undertaken the act of cooking, praise that implies that cooking is an inherently female act. ”””””

PROVE 8 (FROM HER BOOK)

According to a popular literature book“”” DEAR IJEAWELE OR A FEMINIST MANIFESTO IN FIFTEEN SUGGESTIONS “””

FEMINIST ADICHIE CHIMANMANDA NGOZI she says in her book:

TENTH SUGGESTION

“”””””””” She can counter ideas about static ‘gender roles’ if she has been empowered by her familiarity with alternatives. If she knows an uncle who cooks well – and does so with indifference – then she can smile and brush off the foolishness of somebody who claims that ‘women must do the cooking. “””””””””

This should give men a little rethink about cooking and house/domestic chores which they see as a role of a woman. Which are to be to be shared equally between the two partners. As for me (PATRICKSTORIES) cooking, domestic chores- cleaning sweeping, mopping are supposed to be shared equally. Cooking was never meant for women. Anybody can cook whether male or female.

PROVE 9 (FROM HER BOOK)

According to a popular literature book “” WE SHOULD ALL BE FEMINIST “””

FEMINIST Adichie Chimanmanda Ngozi she says in her book:

“””””””””“And then we do a much greater disservice to girls, because we raise them to cater to the fragile egos of males. We teach girls to shrink themselves, to make themselves smaller. We say to girls: You can have ambition, but not too much. You should aim to be successful but not too successful, otherwise you will threaten the man. If you are the breadwinner in your relationship with a man, pretend that you are not, especially in public, otherwise you will emasculate him. But what if we question the premise itself: Why should a woman’s success be a threat to a man? What if we decide to simply dispose of that word—and I don’t know if there is an English word I dislike more than this—emasculation. “”””””””””

Note-

Emasculation– the act of depriving of virility, or the state of being so deprived.

Loss of power and masculinity.

Neutering a male animal by removing the testicles.

PROVE 10 (FROM HER BOOK)

According to a popular literature book “”” DEAR IJEAWELE OR A FEMINIST MANIFESTO IN FIFTEEN SUGGESTIONS “””

FEMINIST Adichie Chimanmanda Ngozi she says in her book:

From the second Suggestion

FOURTH ARGUMENT (the idea that women should not be given much freedom)

Men believe the man-hating/act of misandrist from feminist is based on the fact that if women are given privilege/freedom to act or do anything they can supersede men. So they decided that such freedom are gained more for men than women. So they own idea is that feminist that agitate for such freedom are labelled as misandrist.

Another annoying claim I need to tackle is the fact that some men still give assumptions as stated below:

“”””” But why women go about agitating for freedom? Whenever you do anything in life you have to follow rules. You can’t just do anything you like. “””””

For better understanding am going to define the meaning of freedom from different source and with link beneath it as prove for my write-up and for the viewers/readers.

ACCORDING TO WIKIPEDIA

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Freedom

Freedom, generally, is having the ability to act or change without constraint. Something is “free” if it can change easily and is not constrained in its present state. In philosophy and religion, it is associated with having free will and being without undue or unjust constraints, or enslavement, and is an idea closely related to the concept of liberty.

ACCORDING TO CAMBRIDGE DICTIONARY

https://dictionary.cambridge.org/dictionary/english/freedom

The condition or right of being able or allowed to do, say, think, etc. whatever you want to, without being controlled or limited.
A right to act in the way you think you should.
The state of not being in prison.
To honour someone by giving them special rights in a particular city.

ACCORDING TO MERRIAM-WEBSTER DICTIONARY

https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/freedom

1. The quality or state of being free: such as

A: the absence of necessity, coercion, or constraint in choice or action

B: liberation from slavery or restraint or from the power of another: INDEPENDENCE

C: the quality or state of being exempt or released usually from something onerous.

A. A political right.

B. Franchise, privilege.

In reference to the above statement made by men about women. For me personally the freedom the men are taking about are something they feel the women should not have right over, they feel if women are given much freedom on these things, the equality of the sexes will be achieve . So what the men fight against include

Freedom for a women to pursue a career (otherwise the men will feel threaten )
Freedom for women to accomplish too much(otherwise the men will feel threaten )
Freedom for a women to express the female subordination which I termed oppression, subjugation and subjection that have made women become less in the society.

Equality of women before the law, in educational and professional opportunities
Freedom for a women to own property rights
Freedom for a women to have Equal pay for equal work
Freedom for a women to have say on protection from rape
Freedom for a women from all dehumanizing forces.

From the 8 reasons I listed above, they try to label feminist as misandrist, because men have more right to these things so women hate such men for it. These 8 reasons are a threat to some men, so they make sure women are not given freedom. Any women who fight for such are labelled as misandrist in connection to feminist.

Here In my view, feminism is not necessarily about just letting women do whatever they want (freedom), as women can be oppressive but instead feminism is about liberty from oppression. It’s a complicated movement with a lot of goals and a lot of layers.

I personally kick against this statement or the idea that men posit, but for me every human have freedom to choose a career, freedom to work. Freedom should not be limited to only women. Men and women have freedom to choose a career. Feminist are not only after freedom but after equality of both sexes.

Why are we talking about freedom, the last time I checked freedom was not part of the agitation made by the feminist.

Feminism is about freedom and liberty from oppression to me, not freedom and liberty to do anything in the world.

The following are the 2 prove to counter the idea/notion of linking feminism and misandry together based on the idea that women should not be given much freedom

PROVE 1 (FROM HER BOOK)

According to a popular literature book “” WE SHOULD ALL BE FEMINIST “””

FEMINIST Adichie Chimanmanda Ngozi she says in her book:

Note-

Emasculation– the act of depriving of virility, or the state of being so deprived.

Loss of power and masculinity.

Neutering a male animal by removing the testicles.

PROVE 2 (FROM HER BOOK)

According to a popular literature book “” WE SHOULD ALL BE FEMINIST “” FEMINIST Adichie Chimanmanda Ngozi she says in her book:

“”””” We teach females that in relationships, compromise is what a woman is more likely to do. We raise girls to see each other as competitors—not for jobs or accomplishments, which in my opinion can be a good thing—but for the attention of men. “”””””

FIFTH ARGUMENT (the idea that women duties in life is childbearing)

Another annoying claim I need to tackle is the fact that some men still give assumptions as stated below:

“””” the primary obligation of a woman in her life is to make babies “””””

Let get to know what is childbearing for better clarification on the fifth argument-

According to Wikipedia

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Childbirth

Childbirth, also known as labour and delivery, is the ending of pregnancy where one or more babies leaves the uterus by passing through the vagina or by Caesarean section.

According to merriam-webster dictionary

https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/childbearing

Of or relating to the process of conceiving, being pregnant with, and giving birth to children.
The act of bringing forth children : CHILDBIRTH

According to Cambridge dictionary

https://dictionary.cambridge.org/dictionary/english/childbearing

The process of having babies.
Of or relating to the process of a woman becoming pregnant and giving birth to a baby.

According Collins dictionary

https://googleweblight.com/i?u=https://www.collinsdictionary.com/dictionary/english/child-bearing&hl=en-NG&grqid=EZ8ZUkyl&grqid=EZ8ZUkyl&grqid=EZ8ZUkyl

The act or process of carrying and giving birth to a child

DETAILED EXPLANATION

Men believe the man-hating/act of misandrist from feminist is based on the idea of baby making. Men feel women hate men for not having babies so they feel feminist got such idea and rose up to fight men. Again men feel the privilege to not have babies based on the pregnancy period (9 months) and menstruation (period) factors connected to it. Men feel women don’t have such privilege so they fight for it. So men label such feminist as misandrist.

The following are the 2 proves to counter the idea/notion of linking feminism and misandry together based on the idea that women duties in life is childbearing or the primary obligation of a woman in her life is to make babies based on their female biology(period).

PROVE 1 (biological revolution)

Because of these ideas it give right to another type and crucial feminism called the radical feminism that emphasize on biological revolution. The fight is not to hate men but to change the biology of women. Here is what they have to say about it:

BIOLOGICAL REVOLUTION

This group of feminists claims that the root of women’s oppression is biological. Therefore, radical feminism believes that woman’s liberation requires a biological revolution. Radical feminism questions why women must adopt certain roles based on their biology, just as it questions why men adopt certain other roles based on gender.

They attempt to draw lines between biologically determined behavior and culturally determined behavior in order to free both men and women as much as possible from such gender roles.

Moreover, they believe that the whole system must be abolished even its biological aspects. Radical feminism principles contains many interesting claims such as pregnancy and child birth in which they consider them as the most painful and unpleasant experiences a woman can pass through.

They believe that the technology should be used to eliminate all kinds of pain particularly from the fundamental inequality of the bearing and rising of the children. This must be the basic achievement because they believe that the heart of women’s oppression is their childbearing and childrearing roles.

Radical feminists believe that the male psychology or biology is the source of women’s oppression and pain. This is why they call for separation and the independence from men.

PROVE 2 (without period and pregnancy no men in the society)

For better understanding of these prove 2, am going to define the meaning of period and pregnancy from different sources and with links beneath it as prove for my write-up and for the viewers/readers.

DEFINITION OF MENSTRUATION

According to Wikipedia

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Menstruation

Menstruation, also known as a period or monthly, is the regular discharge of blood and mucosal tissue (known as menses) from the inner lining of the uterus through the vagina.

According to site research

https://www.medicinenet.com/menstruation/article.htm#what_should_i_know_about_menstruation_monthly_period_what_is_the_medical_definition_it

Medically, menstruation (also termed period or bleeding) is the process in a woman of discharging (through the vagina) blood and other materials from the lining of the uterus at about one monthly interval from puberty until menopause (ceasing of regular menstrual cycles), except during pregnancy. This discharging process lasts about 3-5 days.

According to Cambridge dictionary

https://dictionary.cambridge.org/dictionary/english/menstruationmenstruation

The flow of blood from a woman’s uterus.

DEFINITION OF PREGNANCY

According to Wikipedia

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/PregnancyPregnancy

Pregnancy, also known as gestation, is the time during which one or more offspring develops inside a woman.S

According to Cambridge dictionary

https://dictionary.cambridge.org/dictionary/english/pregnancy

The state of being pregnant

From the above definitions sof both terms, again men feel the privilege to not have babies based on the pregnancy period (9 months) and menstruation (period) factors connected to it. Men feel women don’t have such privilege so they fight for it. So men label such feminist as misandrist. The men in the society are misled with such ideas. Period are a natural phenomenon for a women. So such reason will not be a debate for woman to hate men instead feminism is about equality not man-hating (misandry)

According to a popular literature book “”” DEAR IJEAWELE OR A FEMINIST MANIFESTO IN FIFTEEN SUGGESTIONS “””

FEMINIST Adichie Chimanmanda Ngozi she says in her book:

From the twelfth suggestion

“””””And speaking of shame – never, ever link sexuality and shame. Or nakedness and shame. Teach her to reject the linking of shame and female biology. Why were we raised to speak in low tones about periods? To be filled with shame if our menstrual blood happened to stain our skirt? Periods are nothing to be ashamed of. Periods are normal and natural, and the human species would not be here if periods did not exist. I remember a man who said a period was like shit. Well, sacred shit, I told him, because you wouldn’t be here if periods didn’t happen. “””””

SIXTH ARGUMENT (the idea that women have a specific role in the society which can’t be change)

Here men have internalize that women will continue to have these roles no matter how, so when feminist kick against such roles they label them as misandrist forgetting that feminism is about equality. Here feminist are trying to say that a women should not be placed on a particular/specific role in the society, that theses role over the years become a tradition which is passed down to generations. So when feminist call such roles as absurd, the men folks labelled them as misandrist, which is totally wrong.

For me personally I tagged these specific role as gender role. For better understanding sixth argument am going to define the meaning of gender roles.

DEFINITION OF GENDER ROLES

According to Wikipedia

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gender_role

A gender role, also known as a sex role is a social role encompassing a range of behaviours and attitudes that are generally considered acceptable, appropriate, or desirable for people based on their actual or perceived sex Gender roles are usually centred on conceptions of femininity and masculinity, although there are exceptions and variations.

According to Wikipedia

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gender

Gender is the range of characteristics pertaining to, and differentiating between, masculinity and femininity. Depending on the context, these characteristics may include biological sex (i.e., the state of being male, female, or an intersex variation), sex-based social structures (i.e., gender roles), or gender identity.

According to other research by individuals

Gender refers to ways of being male and female within a culture or society. The larger group promotes a certain type of gender roles, responsibilities, and relationships for a male or female.. They can and have been changed as society progresses.

Here are the list of gender roles for both male and female which society have place for them:

FEMALE GENDER/SEX ROLES

Gender/sex roles that describe all women in the society include:

Women are supposed to have “clean jobs” such as secretaries, teachers, and librarians
Women are not good at maths
Women are nurses, not doctors
Women are not as strong as men
Women are supposed to make less money than men
The best women are stay at home moms
Women don’t need to go to college
Women don’t play sports
Women are not politicians
Women are quieter than men and not meant to speak out
Women are supposed to be submissive and do as they are told
Women are supposed to cook and do housework
Women are responsible for raising children
Women do not have technical skills and are not good at “hands on” projects such as car repairs
Women are meant to be the damsel in distress; never the hero
Women are supposed to look pretty and be looked at
Women love to sing and dance
Women do not play video games
Women are never in charge
Women should be secretaries
Women should be “ladylike.”

MALE GENDER/SEX ROLES

Gender/sex roles that describe all men in the society are:

All men enjoy working on cars
Men are not nurses, they are doctors
Men do “dirty jobs” such as construction and mechanics; they are not secretaries, teachers, or cosmetologists
Men do not do housework and they are not responsible for taking care of children
Men play video games
Men play sports
Men enjoy outdoor activities such as camping, fishing, and hiking
Men are in charge; they are always at the top
As husbands, men tell their wives what to do
Men are good at math
It is always men who work in science, engineering, and other technical fields
Men do not cook, sew, or do crafts or cooking
Men should be macho.
Men shouldn’t kindergarten teachers.

From the above analysis and detail examples of gender roles designated to both male and female in the society. Am able to come with some backups to underpin the reason why men feel that gendered roles for a woman can’t change in the society.

Here are the list of a little draft/excerpt from our renowned feminist FEMINIST ADICHIE CHIMANMANDA NGOZI to underpin my argument against such idea that women have a specific role in the society which cannot be change thereby labelling feminist as misandrist/man-hating:

PROVE 1(FROM HER BOOK)

According to a popular literature book “”” WE SHOULD ALL BE FEMINIST “””

FEMINIST Adichie Chimanmanda Ngozi she says in her book:

“””””” Gender matters everywhere in the world. And I would like today to ask that we begin to dream about and plan for a different world. A fairer world. A world of happier men and happier women who are truer to themselves. And this is how to start: We must raise our daughters differently. We must also raise our sons differently. “””””

PROVE 2(FROM HER BOOK)

According to a popular literature book “”” WE SHOULD ALL BE FEMINIST “””

FEMINIST Adichie Chimanmanda Ngozi she says in her book:

“”””” That many men do not actively think about gender or notice gender. Because gender can be uncomfortable, there are easy ways to close this conversation. Other men might respond by saying: Okay, this is interesting, but I don’t think like that. I don’t even think about gender. Some people will bring up evolutionary biology and apes, how female apes bow to male apes—that sort of thing. But the point is this: We are not apes. Apes also live in trees and eat earthworms. We do not. “””””

PROVE 3(FROM HER BOOK)

According to a popular literature book “”” WE SHOULD ALL BE FEMINIST “””

FEMINIST Adichie Chimanmanda Ngozi she says in her book:

“”””” I know a woman who hates domestic work, but she pretends that she likes it, because she has been taught that to be “good wife material,” she has to be—to use that Nigerian word—homely. And then she got married. And her husband’s family began to complain that she had changed. Actually, she had not changed. She just got tired of pretending to be what she was not. The problem with gender is that it prescribeSs how we should be rather than recognizing how we are. Imagine how much happier we would be, how much freer to be our true individual selves, if we didn’t have the weight of gender expectations. “””””

PROVE 4 (FROM HER BOOK)

According to a popular literature book “”” WE SHOULD ALL BE FEMINIST “””

FEMINIST Adichie Chimanmanda Ngozi she says in her book:

“””” I am trying to unlearn many lessons of gender I internalized while growing up. But I sometimes still feel vulnerable in the face of gender expectations. “”””

PROVE 5 (FROM HER BOOK)

According to a popular literature book “”” DEAR IJEAWELE OR A FEMINIST MANIFESTO IN FIFTEEN SUGGESTIONS “””

FEMINIST Adichie Chimanmanda Ngozi she says in her book:

From the third Suggestion

““” Gender roles are so deeply conditioned in us that we will often follow them even when they chafe against our true desires, our needs, our happiness. They are very difficult to unlearn, and so it is important to try to make sure that Chizalum rejects them from the beginning. Instead of letting her internalize the idea of gender roles, teach her self-reliance.”””

PROVE 6 (FROM HER BOOK)

According to a popular literature book “”” DEAR IJEAWELE OR A FEMINIST MANIFESTO IN FIFTEEN SUGGESTIONS “””

FEMINIST Adichie Chimanmanda Ngozi she says in her book:

From the third Suggestion

””If we don’t place the straitjacket of gender roles on young children, we give them space to reach their full potential. Please see Chizalum as an individual. Not as a girl who should be a certain way. See her weaknesses and her strengths in an individual way. Do not measure her on a scale of what a girl should be. Measure her on a scale of being the best version of herself.””

PROVE 7 (FROM HER BOOK)

According to a popular literature book “”” DEAR IJEAWELE OR A FEMINIST MANIFESTO IN FIFTEEN SUGGESTIONS “””

FEMINIST Adichie Chimanmanda Ngozi she says in her book:

From the Tenth Suggestion

““”” She can counter ideas about static ‘gender roles’ if she has been empowered by her familiarity with alternatives. If she knows an uncle who cooks well – and does so with indifference – then she can smile and brush off the foolishness of somebody who claims that ‘women must do the cooking. “”””

PROVE 8 (FROM HER BOOK)

According to a popular literature book “”” DEAR IJEAWELE OR A FEMINIST MANIFESTO IN FIFTEEN SUGGESTIONS “””

FEMINIST Adichie Chimanmanda Ngozi she says in her book:

From the third Suggestion

“”””Teach her that the idea of ‘gender roles’ is absolute nonsense. Do not ever tell her that she should or should not do something because she is a girl. ‘Because you are a girl’ is never a reason for anything ever “”””

PROVE 9 (FROM HER BOOK)

According to a popular literature book “”” WE SHOULD ALL BE FEMINIST “””

FEMINIST Adichie Chimanmanda Ngozi she says in her book:

””””” The knowledge of cooking does not come pre-installed in a vagina. Cooking is learned. Cooking – domestic work in general – is a life skill that both men and women should ideally have. It is also a skill that can elude both men and women. We also need to question the idea of marriage as a prize to women, because that is the basis of these absurd debates. If we stop conditioning women to see marriage as a prize, then we would have fewer debates about a wife needing to cook in order to earn that prize. It is interesting to me how early the world starts to invent gender roles. “””””

PROVE 10 (FROM HER BOOK)

According to a popular literature book “”” WE SHOULD ALL BE FEMINIST “””

FEMINIST Adichie Chimanmanda Ngozi she says in her book:

“””” Now here’s a story from my childhood: When I was in primary school in Nsukka, a university town in southeastern Nigeria, my teacher said at the beginning of term that she would give the class a test and whoever got the highest score would be the class monitor. Class monitor was a big deal. If you were class monitor, you would write down the names of noisemakers each day, which was heady enough power on its own, but my teacher would also give you a cane to hold in your hand while you walked around and patrolled the class for noise makers. Of course you were not allowed to actually use the cane. But it was an exciting prospect for the nine-year-old me. I very much wanted to be class monitor. And I got the highest score on the test. Then, to my surprise, my teacher said the monitor had to be a boy. She had forgotten to make that clear earlier; she assumed it was obvious. A boy had the second-highest score on the test. And he would be monitor. What was even more interesting is that this boy was a sweet, gentle soul who had no interest in patrolling the class with a stick. While I was full of ambition to do so. But I was female and he was male and he became class monitor. I have never forgotten that incident. If we do something over and over, it becomes normal. If we see the same thing over and over, it becomes normal. If only boys are made class monitor, then at some point we will all think, even if unconsciously, that the class monitor has to be a boy. If we keep seeing only men as heads of corporations, it starts to seem “natural” that only men should be heads of corporations. ””””””

PROVE 11 (FROM SITE/INTERNET)

I will backed it up with a powerful statement made by FEMINIST/WRITER/ CHIMAMANDA NGOZI ADICHIE where she mentioned about the sexualisation of girls on media (marketing strategy)

Here is a backup to that statement of yours from our own popular Nigeria feminist: FEMINIST Adichie Chimanmanda Ngozi

Here is an interview with her.

For further reading here is the link to convince you.

https://www.google.com/amp/s/qz.com/quartzy/1133732/chimamanda-ngozi-adichie-talks-about-feminism-and-raising-her-daughter-in-a-gendered-world/amp/

Here is the question that was asked her about raising a girl child.

LAUREN ALIX BROWN: So in terms of teaching people how to be feminists, has raising a girl changed or challenged any of your suggestions for how to raise a feminist?

FEMINIST ADICHIE CHIMANMANDA NGOZI: “”””” It hasn’t challenged anything, it’s just that it’s made me realize how difficult it is. Because I think I felt that. I’m only just realizing that sometimes it feels like the universe is conspiring against me. Because I am trying to push against ideas and norms that are so ingrained that they can start to feel invisible. And it’s little things. I’m just amazed at how everything is GENDERED—diapers. I mean baby bodies are the same. But now there are diapers where there’s the girl picture. Some months ago we wanted to get the overnight diapers for Baby because she was starting to wake up quite wet. So we wanted to get the diapers marketed as overnight because they absorb more and there’s girls and boys. I remember saying to my husband, who’s a physician, I said, “Do you think maybe the boys’ has a little thing to hold the penis? I mean, why are they different? He had a good laugh and he’s like, “It’s just marketing.” I remember thinking, there has to be a reason for this because it made no sense to me. But there’s no reason for it. Also, I’m just realizing how early the sexualization of girls starts. Four-year-old girls’ dresses. I find many of them disturbing. It’s sort of like four year olds’ now have to be mini women. I’m noticing these things a lot more just because of my child. And children’s books and cartoons. It does sometimes feel that there’s a conspiracy of the universe. But at the same time, I’m utterly undeterred.

It requires pushing back, but I’m going to push back. I want to equip her with the tools. I’m hoping that she grows up to be the girl who sort of mocks these things—who gets it and who mocks them. That’s my hope, that would be ideal for me. “”””””

PROVE 12 (FROM HER BOOK)

According to a popular literature book “” WE SHOULD ALL BE FEMINIST “””

FEMINIST Adichie Chimanmanda Ngozi she says in her book:

“”” But what matters even more is our attitude, our mind-set. What if, in raising children, we focus on ability instead of gender? What if we focus on interest instead of gender? “””

PROVE 13 (FROM HER BOOK)

According to a popular literature book “”” WE SHOULD ALL BE FEMINIST “””

FEMINIST Adichie Chimanmanda Ngozi she says in her book:

””””Gender is not an easy conversation to have. It makes people uncomfortable, sometimes even irritable. Both men and women are resistant to talk about gender, or are quick to dismiss the problems of gender. Because thinking of changing the status quo is always uncomfortable. ””””

PROVE 14 (FROM SITE/INTERNET-SPEECH)

I will backed it up with a powerful statement made by FEMINIST/WRITER/ CHIMAMANDA NGOZI ADICHIE where she mentioned “””” MOTHER IN RELATON TO FEMININITY“”””

For further reading here is the link to the SPEECH convince you:

https://time.com/3921492/chimamanda-ngozi-adichie-graduation-commencement-wellesley/

FEMINIST/WRITER/ CHIMAMANDA NGOZI ADICHIE

IN HER SPEECH SHE SAYS-

“”””” Okay, one last thing about my mother. My mother and I do not agree on many things regarding gender. There are certain things my mother believes a person should do, for the simple reason that said person ‘is a woman.’ Such as nod occasionally and smile even when smiling is the last thing one wants to do. Such as strategically give in to certain arguments, especially when arguing with a non-female. Such as get married and have children. I can think of fairly good reasons for doing any of these. But ‘because you are a woman’ is not one of them. And so, Class of 2015, never ever accept ‘Because you are a Woman’ as a reason for doing or not doing anything. “”””

SEVENTH ARGUMENT (the idea that culture -societal norms- social influence- social convention have to be maintain)

Another annoying claim I need to tackle is the fact that some men still give assumptions as stated below:

””””The convention of segregating women and assigning them to certain tasks is deeply ingrained in our society. You cannot just ignore the power of culture -societal norms- social influence- social convention. Culture- societal norms- social influence- social convention are what most people generally believe is correct “”””

For better understanding seventh argument am going to define the meaning of culture -societal norms- social influence- social convention from different source and with link beneath it as prove for my write-up and for the viewers/readers.

DEFINITION OF CULTURE

1. According to Wikipedia

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Culture

Culture is an umbrella term which encompasses the social behaviour and norms found in human societies, as well as the knowledge, beliefs, arts, laws, customs, capabilities and habits of the individuals in these groups. Humans acquire culture through the learning processes of enculturation and socialization, which is shown by the diversity of cultures across societies. A cultural norm codifies acceptable conduct in society; it serves as guideline for behaviour, dress, language, and demeanour in a situation, which serves as a template for expectations in a social group.

2. According to merriam-webster dictionary

https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/culture

The customary beliefs, social forms, and material traits of a racial, religious, or social group.
The characteristic features of everyday existence (such as diversions or a way of life) shared by people in a place or time.
The set of shared attitudes, values, goals, and practices that characterizes an institution or organization.
The set of values, conventions, or social practices associated with a particular field, activity, or societal characteristic.
The integrated pattern of human knowledge, belief, and behaviour that depends upon the capacity for learning and transmitting knowledge to succeeding generations.

3. According to Cambridge dictionary

https://www.google.com/amp/s/dictionary.cambridge.org/amp/english/culture

The way of life, especially the general customs and beliefs, of a particular group of people at a particular time.
The way of life of a particular people, esp. as shown in their ordinary behaviour and habits, their attitudes toward each other, and their moral and religious beliefs.
The arts of describing, showing, or performing that represent the traditions or the way of life of a particular people or group; literature, art, music, dance, theatre, etc.

DEFINITION OF SOCIAL NORMS

According to Wikipedia

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Social_norm

Social norms are regarded as collective representations of acceptable group conduct as well as individual perceptions of particular group conduct. They can be viewed as cultural products (including values, customs, and traditions) which represent individuals’ basic knowledge of what others do and think that they should do.

From a sociological perspective, social norms are informal understandings that govern the behavior of members of a society. Social psychology recognizes smaller group units (such as a team or an office) may also endorse norms separately or in addition to cultural or societal expectations.

DEFINITION OF SOCIAL INFLUENCE

According to site research/book

1. https://www.sciencedirect.com/topics/social-sciences/social-influence

2. https://www.sciencedirect.com/referencework/9780080970875/international-encyclopedia-of-the-social-and-behavioral-sciences#book-info

According Robert H. Gass, Social Influence, Sociology of in “International Encyclopedia of the Social & Behavioral Sciences (Second Edition), 2015”

Social influence involves intentional and unintentional efforts to change another person’s beliefs, attitudes, or behavior. Unlike persuasion, which is typically intentional and requires some degree of awareness on the part of the target, social influence may be inadvertent or accidental. Social influence often operates via peripheral processing. Hence, the target may be unaware of the influence attempt. Unlike compliance gaining, which is usually goal directed, social influence is often non-goal directed and the outcomes may be inconsistent with, or unrelated to, a communicator’s goals. Social influence encompasses such strategies as indebtedness or reciprocity, commitment, social proof, liking and attractiveness, authority, and scarcity.

DEFINITION OF SOCIAL CONVENTION (NORM)

1. According to Wikipedia

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Convention_(norm)

A convention is a set of agreed, stipulated, or generally accepted standards, norms, social norms, or criteria, often taking the form of a custom.

In a social context, a convention may retain the character of an “unwritten law” of custom (for example, the manner in which people greet each other, such as by shaking each other’s hands). Certain types of rules or customs may become law and regulatory legislation may be introduced to formalize or enforce the convention (for example, laws that define on which side of the road vehicles must be driven).

2. According to site research/book

https://press.princeton.edu/books/hardcover/9780691140902/social-conventions

According to Andrei Marmor in his book “social conventions: from language to law”

Social conventions are those arbitrary rules and norms governing the countless behaviors all of us engage in every day without necessarily thinking about them, from shaking hands when greeting someone to driving on the right side of the road.
Social Conventions is a much-needed reappraisal of the nature of the rules that regulate virtually every aspect of human conduct.

DETAILED EXPLANATION

This statement is a fallacy and totally incorrect. Here the menfolk’s feel feminist that kick or go against culture (social influence, societal norms and social convention) are misandrist. The men labelled feminist as misandrist because the men feel when the culture (social influence, social norms and social convention) favour the women, the women and men are now equal. So the labelling of feminist as misandrist goes a long way that it didn’t favour the women. But sometimes the menfolk’s do forget that feminism is about equality.

In reference to social influence, social norms and social convention in the above statement made by some people/men. What men/people are saying if the society norms says child marriage is good, we should accept it, despite knowing it’s totally? That is stupid. Most of the societal norms are wrong sometimes, like the idea of the cooking or that a women place end in kitchen which men/people feel are the best is still totally wrong.

We are in the 21 century, some people have drop that absurd idea about WOMEN BELONG IN THE KITCHEN/WOMEN SHOULD NOT WORK. Change is constant, so culture- societal norms- social conventions must have change.

In fact, it could be just the opposite, it could be that certain societal norms are very immoral (for instance, in some societies using Nigeria as reference, it may have been considered the right thing to do by killing live infants twins, and in other African societies like it is considered acceptable to take a 10 years old and make her your wife and I call that child marriage).

Now I want to ask the men/people a simple question who believe that culture-social influence, societal norms and social convention can’t be change

Is child marriage or killing of twins wrong or right according to social conventions or culture or social norms? Please ponder on that.

The following are the 3 proves to counter the idea/notion of linking feminism and misandry together based on the idea that culture -social norms- social influence- social convention have to be maintain and not changed:

PROVE 1 (FROM HER BOOK)

According to a popular literature book “”” WE SHOULD ALL BE FEMINIST “””

FEMINIST Adichie Chimanmanda Ngozi she says in her book:

“”””” Some people will say a woman is subordinate to men because it’s our culture. But culture is constantly changing. I have beautiful twin nieces who are fifteen. If they had been born a hundred years ago, they would have been taken away and killed. Because a hundred years ago, Igbo culture considered the birth of twins to be an evil omen. Today that practice is unimaginable to all Igbo people.

What is the point of culture? Culture functions ultimately to ensure the preservation and continuity of a people. In my family, I am the child who is most interested in the story of who we are, in ancestral lands, in our tradition. My brothers are not as interested as I am. But I cannot participate, because Igbo culture privileges men and only the male members of the extended family can attend the meetings where major family decisions are taken. So although I am the one who is most interested in these things, I cannot attend the meeting. I cannot have a formal say. Because I am female. Culture does not make people. People make culture. If it is true that the full humanity of women is not our culture, then we can and must make it our culture. “””””

PROVE 2 (INTERNET/SITE)

I will backed it up with a powerful statement made by FEMINIST/WRITER/ CHIMAMANDA NGOZI ADICHIE where she mentioned/talk on “””” culture integrated with appearance (make up) “””

For further reading here is the link to convince you.

https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.forbes.com/sites/karenhua/2016/10/21/the-cultural-importance-of-chimamanda-ngozi-adichies-boots-beauty-campaign/amp/

Here is her speech:

“”” Our culture teaches us that to be taken seriously, women should not care too much about their appearance. So I stopped wearing makeup and became a false version of myself,” Adichie said. “But then I woke up because makeup doesn’t actually mean anything. It’s about how I feel when I get it right—what makes me walk ever so taller. It’s about the face I choose to show the world and what I choose to say. ”””

PROVE 3 (FROM SITE/ INTERNET-TALK)

I will backed it up with a powerful ted talk made by FEMINIST/WRITER/ CHIMAMANDA NGOZI ADICHIE where she mentioned/talk on “””” culture integrated with single story“”””

For further reading here is the link to convince you.

https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story/transcript?language=en

Here is her speech: THE DANGERS OF SINGLR STORY

00:12

I’m a storyteller. And I would like to tell you a few personal stories about what I like to call “the danger of the single story.” I grew up on a university campus in eastern Nigeria. My mother says that I started reading at the age of two, although I think four is probably close to the truth. So I was an early reader, and what I read were British and American children’s books.

00:39

I was also an early writer, and when I began to write, at about the age of seven, stories in pencil with crayon illustrations that my poor mother was obligated to read, I wrote exactly the kinds of stories I was reading: All my characters were white and blue-eyed, they played in the snow, they ate apples,

01:04

(Laughter)

01:06

And they talked a lot about the weather, how lovely it was that the sun had come out.

01:10

(Laughter)

01:12

Now, this despite the fact that I lived in Nigeria. I had never been outside Nigeria. We didn’t have snow, we ate mangoes, and we never talked about the weather, because there was no need to.

01:26

My characters also drank a lot of ginger beer, because the characters in the British books I read drank ginger beer. Never mind that I had no idea what ginger beer was.

01:36

(Laughter)

01:37

And for many years afterwards, I would have a desperate desire to taste ginger beer. But that is another story.

01:44

What this demonstrates, I think, is how impressionable and vulnerable we are in the face of a story, particularly as children. Because all I had read were books in which characters were foreign, I had become convinced that books by their very nature had to have foreigners in them and had to be about things with which I could not personally identify. Now, things changed when I discovered African books. There weren’t many of them available, and they weren’t quite as easy to find as the foreign books.

02:15

But because of writers like Chinua Achebe and Camara Laye, I went through a mental shift in my perception of literature. I realized that people like me, girls with skin the color of chocolate, whose kinky hair could not form ponytails, could also exist in literature. I started to write about things I recognized.

02:36

Now, I loved those American and British books I read. They stirred my imagination. They opened up new worlds for me. But the unintended consequence was that I did not know that people like me could exist in literature. So what the discovery of African writers did for me was this: It saved me from having a single story of what books are.

02:59

I come from a conventional, middle-class Nigerian family. My father was a professor. My mother was an administrator. And so we had, as was the norm, live-in domestic help, who would often come from nearby rural villages. So, the year I turned eight, we got a new house boy. His name was Fide. The only thing my mother told us about him was that his family was very poor. My mother sent yams and rice, and our old clothes, to his family. And when I didn’t finish my dinner, my mother would say, “Finish your food! Don’t you know? People like Fide’s family have nothing.” So I felt enormous pity for Fide’s family.

03:43

Then one Saturday, we went to his village to visit, and his mother showed us a beautifully patterned basket made of dyed raffia that his brother had made. I was startled. It had not occurred to me that anybody in his family could actually make something. All I had heard about them was how poor they were, so that it had become impossible for me to see them as anything else but poor. Their poverty was my single story of them.

04:13

Years later, I thought about this when I left Nigeria to go to university in the United States. I was 19. My American roommate was shocked by me. She asked where I had learned to speak English so well, and was confused when I said that Nigeria happened to have English as its official language. She asked if she could listen to what she called my “tribal music,” and was consequently very disappointed when I produced my tape of Mariah Carey.

04:42

(Laughter)

04:45

She assumed that I did not know how to use a stove.

04:49

What struck me was this: She had felt sorry for me even before she saw me. Her default position toward me, as an African, was a kind of patronizing, well-meaning pity. My roommate had a single story of Africa: a single story of catastrophe. In this single story, there was no possibility of Africans being similar to her in any way, no possibility of feelings more complex than pity, no possibility of a connection as human equals.

05:21

I must say that before I went to the U.S., I didn’t consciously identify as African. But in the U.S., whenever Africa came up, people turned to me. Never mind that I knew nothing about places like Namibia. But I did come to embrace this new identity, and in many ways I think of myself now as African. Although I still get quite irritable when Africa is referred to as a country, the most recent example being my otherwise wonderful flight from Lagos two days ago, in which there was an announcement on the Virgin flight about the charity work in “India, Africa and other countries.”

05:55

(Laughter)

05:56

So, after I had spent some years in the U.S. as an African, I began to understand my roommate’s response to me. If I had not grown up in Nigeria, and if all I knew about Africa were from popular images, I too would think that Africa was a place of beautiful landscapes, beautiful animals, and incomprehensible people, fighting senseless wars, dying of poverty and AIDS, unable to speak for themselves and waiting to be saved by a kind, white foreigner. I would see Africans in the same way that I, as a child, had seen Fide’s family.

06:35

This single story of Africa ultimately comes, I think, from Western literature. Now, here is a quote from the writing of a London merchant called John Lok, who sailed to west Africa in 1561 and kept a fascinating account of his voyage. After referring to the black Africans as “beasts who have no houses,” he writes, “They are also people without heads, having their mouth and eyes in their breasts.”

07:05

Now, I’ve laughed every time I’ve read this. And one must admire the imagination of John Lok. But what is important about his writing is that it represents the beginning of a tradition of telling African stories in the West: A tradition of Sub-Saharan Africa as a place of negatives, of difference, of darkness, of people who, in the words of the wonderful poet Rudyard Kipling, are “half devil, half child.”

07:32

And so, I began to realize that my American roommate must have throughout her life seen and heard different versions of this single story, as had a professor, who once told me that my novel was not “authentically African.” Now, I was quite willing to contend that there were a number of things wrong with the novel, that it had failed in a number of places, but I had not quite imagined that it had failed at achieving something called African authenticity. In fact, I did not know what African authenticity was. The professor told me that my characters were too much like him, an educated and middle-class man. My characters drove cars. They were not starving. Therefore they were not authentically African.

08:21

But I must quickly add that I too am just as guilty in the question of the single story. A few years ago, I visited Mexico from the U.S. The political climate in the U.S. at the time was tense, and there were debates going on about immigration. And, as often happens in America, immigration became synonymous with Mexicans. There were endless stories of Mexicans as people who were fleecing the healthcare system, sneaking across the border, being arrested at the border, that sort of thing.

08:54

I remember walking around on my first day in Guadalajara, watching the people going to work, rolling up tortillas in the marketplace, smoking, laughing. I remember first feeling slight surprise. And then, I was overwhelmed with shame. I realized that I had been so immersed in the media coverage of Mexicans that they had become one thing in my mind, the abject immigrant. I had bought into the single story of Mexicans and I could not have been more ashamed of myself.

09:26

So that is how to create a single story, show a people as one thing, as only one thing, over and over again, and that is what they become.

09:37

It is impossible to talk about the single story without talking about power. There is a word, an Igbo word, that I think about whenever I think about the power structures of the world, and it is “nkali.” It’s a noun that loosely translates to “to be greater than another.” Like our economic and political worlds, stories too are defined by the principle of nkali: How they are told, who tells them, when they’re told, how many stories are told, are really dependent on power.

10:12

Power is the ability not just to tell the story of another person, but to make it the definitive story of that person. The Palestinian poet Mourid Barghouti writes that if you want to dispossess a people, the simplest way to do it is to tell their story and to start with, “secondly.” Start the story with the arrows of the Native Americans, and not with the arrival of the British, and you have an entirely different story. Start the story with the failure of the African state, and not with the colonial creation of the African state, and you have an entirely different story.

10:52

I recently spoke at a university where a student told me that it was such a shame that Nigerian men were physical abusers like the father character in my novel. I told him that I had just read a novel called “American Psycho” —

11:08

(Laughter)

11:10

— And that it was such a shame that young Americans were serial murderers.

11:15

(Laughter)

11:19

(Applause)

11:25

Now, obviously I said this in a fit of mild irritation.

11:28

(Laughter)

11:30

But it would never have occurred to me to think that just because I had read a novel in which a character was a serial killer that he was somehow representative of all Americans. This is not because I am a better person than that student, but because of America’s cultural and economic power, I had many stories of America. I had read Tyler and Updike and Steinbeck and Gaitskill. I did not have a single story of America.

11:55

When I learned, some years ago, that writers were expected to have had really unhappy childhoods to be successful, I began to think about how I could invent horrible things my parents had done to me.

12:08

(Laughter)

12:10

But the truth is that I had a very happy childhood, full of laughter and love, in a very close-knit family.

12:17

But I also had grandfathers who died in refugee camps. My cousin Polle died because he could not get adequate healthcare. One of my closest friends, Okoloma, died in a plane crash because our fire trucks did not have water. I grew up under repressive military governments that devalued education, so that sometimes, my parents were not paid their salaries. And so, as a child, I saw jam disappear from the breakfast table, then margarine disappeared, then bread became too expensive, then milk became rationed. And most of all, a kind of normalized political fear invaded our lives.

12:57

All of these stories make me who I am. But to insist on only these negative stories is to flatten my experience and to overlook the many other stories that formed me. The single story creates stereotypes, and the problem with stereotypes is not that they are untrue, but that they are incomplete. They make one story become the only story.

13:25

Of course, Africa is a continent full of catastrophes: There are immense ones, such as the horrific rapes in Congo and depressing ones, such as the fact that 5,000 people apply for one job vacancy in Nigeria. But there are other stories that are not about catastrophe, and it is very important, it is just as important, to talk about them.

13:45

I’ve always felt that it is impossible to engage properly with a place or a person without engaging with all of the stories of that place and that person. The consequence of the single story is this: It robs people of dignity. It makes our recognition of our equal humanity difficult. It emphasizes how we are different rather than how we are similar.

14:09

So what if before my Mexican trip, I had followed the immigration debate from both sides, the U.S. and the Mexican? What if my mother had told us that Fide’s family was poor and hardworking? What if we had an African television network that broadcast diverse African stories all over the world? What the Nigerian writer Chinua Achebe calls “a balance of stories.”

14:33

What if my roommate knew about my Nigerian publisher, Muhtar Bakare, a remarkable man who left his job in a bank to follow his dream and start a publishing house? Now, the conventional wisdom was that Nigerians don’t read literature. He disagreed. He felt that people who could read, would read, if you made literature affordable and available to them.

14:56

Shortly after he published my first novel, I went to a TV station in Lagos to do an interview, and a woman who worked there as a messenger came up to me and said, “I really liked your novel. I didn’t like the ending. Now, you must write a sequel, and this is what will happen …”

15:11

(Laughter)

15:14

And she went on to tell me what to write in the sequel. I was not only charmed, I was very moved. Here was a woman, part of the ordinary masses of Nigerians, who were not supposed to be readers. She had not only read the book, but she had taken ownership of it and felt justified in telling me what to write in the sequel.

15:33

Now, what if my roommate knew about my friend Funmi Iyanda, a fearless woman who hosts a TV show in Lagos, and is determined to tell the stories that we prefer to forget? What if my roommate knew about the heart procedure that was performed in the Lagos hospital last week? What if my roommate knew about contemporary Nigerian music, talented people singing in English and Pidgin, and Igbo and Yoruba and Ijo, mixing influences from Jay-Z to Fela to Bob Marley to their grandfathers.

16:06

What if my roommate knew about the female lawyer who recently went to court in Nigeria to challenge a ridiculous law that required women to get their husband’s consent before renewing their passports? What if my roommate knew about Nollywood, full of innovative people making films despite great technical odds, films so popular that they really are the best example of Nigerians consuming what they produce? What if my roommate knew about my wonderfully ambitious hair braider, who has just started her own business selling hair extensions? Or about the millions of other Nigerians who start businesses and sometimes fail, but continue to nurse ambition?

16:47

Every time I am home I am confronted with the usual sources of irritation for most Nigerians: our failed infrastructure, our failed government, but also by the incredible resilience of people who thrive despite the government, rather than because of it. I teach writing workshops in Lagos every summer, and it is amazing to me how many people apply, how many people are eager to write, to tell stories.

17:14

My Nigerian publisher and I have just started a non-profit called Farafina Trust, and we have big dreams of building libraries and refurbishing libraries that already exist and providing books for state schools that don’t have anything in their libraries, and also of organizing lots and lots of workshops, in reading and writing, for all the people who are eager to tell our many stories.

17:36

Stories matter. Many stories matter. Stories have been used to dispossess and to malign, but stories can also be used to empower and to humanize. Stories can break the dignity of a people, but stories can also repair that broken dignity.

17:56

The American writer Alice Walker wrote this about her Southern relatives who had moved to the North. She introduced them to a book about the Southern life that they had left behind. “They sat around, reading the book themselves, listening to me read the book, and a kind of paradise was regained.”

18:17

I would like to end with this thought: That when we reject the single story, when we realize that there is never a single story about any place, we regain a kind of paradise.

18:30

Thank you.

18:31

(Applause)

CONCLUSION

This idea of feminist subjected to being misandrist make me feel bad. With some proves above, I guess I have answered some troubled thoughts to the people/men who think about the idea of equating feminism and misandry together. The whole idea of linking feminism with misandry (man-hating) shouldd be crossed out for those reasons and proves given above.

COMPETING INTERESTS

I declare that I have no financial or personal relationships that may have inappropriately influenced me in writing this article. I write this articles based on my experience with those men/people who have such archaic mentality of linking feminism and misandry together.

QUESTIONS FOR MY READER/VIEWS TO PONDER ON:

What are your own contributions, views and insights on the articles?

Do your beliefs and behaviours support equality? If yes or no, explain
Do you believe that women and men deserve equal rights and equal opportunities? If yes or no, explain
If you believe in equality for women, but not in feminism, can you articulate why?
How was the situation of woman in the past before the coming of feminism? Was it fair, healthy, good or bad?
Why was feminism brought to woman?
Was feminism efficient to change woman’s life? If yes or no, explain

Please let me know all your reactions, views and insights in the comment box below!

Written by:

Kogwuonye Patrick Onyeka

Writer/Blogger/Educator/Tutor/web developer

University of Benin

www.facebook.com/patrickstories

Credited to :

All feminist movement and organization that bring out matters concerning women

4 comments

majaalifee says:

April 30, 2020 at 9:45 am

☺️🥀💫

LikeLike

- PATRICK STORIES says:
  
  May 22, 2020 at 10:40 am
  
  Thanks for the comments. I appreciate your time and effort used in reading my articles. Thanks again. Am so sorry for not replying all this while. My schedule was tight.
  
  Love this touching smiley you used –
  
  ☺️🥀💫
  
  I appreciate that very much.
  
  Please here some questions put across you where not answered. I wish to see a good inspirational answer to those questions.
  
  1. What are your own contributions, views and insights on the articles?
  
  2. Do your beliefs and behaviours support equality? If yes or no, explain
  
  3. Do you believe that women and men deserve equal rights and equal opportunities? If yes or no, explain
  
  4. If you believe in equality for women, but not in feminism, can you articulate why?
  
  5. How was the situation of woman in the past before the coming of feminism? Was it fair, healthy, good or bad?
  
  6. Why was feminism brought to woman?
  Was feminism efficient to change woman’s life? If yes or no, explain
  
  Please let me know all your reactions, views and insights in the comment box below!
  
  You are welcome
  
  #PATRICKSTORIES
  Peace ✌and Love ❤
  
  LikeLike
  
  - majaalifee says:
    
    May 29, 2020 at 8:13 am
    
    Thanks for the wonderful words. But I don’t have time to answer now. Maybe some other time. I wish you a nice day
    
    LikeLiked by 1 person
    
    - PATRICK STORIES says:
      
      June 4, 2020 at 3:57 am
      
      Thanks for the comments. I appreciate your time and effort used in reading my articles.
      
      Thanks again for having the good faith to tell me “”But I don’t have time to answer now. Maybe some other time. “”
      
      Am so sorry for not replying all this while. My schedule was tight.
      
      Thanks for the wonderful words-I wish you a nice day.
      
      You are welcome
      
      #PATRICKSTORIES
      Peace ✌and Love ❤
      
      LikeLiked by 1 person

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PROVES AGAINST THE ARGUMENTS FROM MEN THAT FEMINISM IS SYNONYMOUS WITH MISANDRY (MAN-HATING)

FIRST ARGUMENT (feminist cannot attain equality with men)

PROVE 1 (FROM HER BOOK)

PROVE 2(FROM HER BOOK)

PROVE 3 (FROM HER BOOK)

PROVE 4 (FROM HER BOOK)

PROVE 5 (FROM HER BOOK)

PROVE 6 (FROM SITE/INTERNET-TALK)

PROVE 7 (FROM SITE/INTERNET-SPEECH)

PROVE 8 (FROM SITE/INTERNET)

PROVE 9 (COMMENTS/THOUGHTS FROM SITE/INTERNET)

PROVE 10 (FROM SITE/INTERNET)

PROVE 11 (FROM FACEBOOK CHAT)

SECOND ARGUMENT (men believe the man-hating from feminist is based on the fight for authority)

DETAILED EXPLANATION

PROVE 1 (DOMINION, AUTHORITY, EVE’S IDENTITY AND AUTHORITY)

EVE’S IDENTITY AND AUTHORITY

PROVE 2 (PRIMOGENITURE NATURE)

PROVE 3 (AUTHORITY AND NAMING ARE MUTUALLY EXCLUSIVE)

PROVE 4 (AUTHORITY AND POWER)

THIRD ARGUMENT (statistics prove that women stay at home more)

PROVE 1 (FROM HER BOOK)

PROVE 2 (FROM HER BOOK)

PROVE 3 (FROM HER BOOK)

PROVE 4 (FROM HER BOOK)

PROVE 5 (FROM HER BOOK)

PROVE 6 (FROM HER BOOK)

PROVE 7(FROM HER BOOK)

PROVE 8 (FROM HER BOOK)

PROVE 9 (FROM HER BOOK)

PROVE 10 (FROM HER BOOK)

FOURTH ARGUMENT (the idea that women should not be given much freedom)

PROVE 1 (FROM HER BOOK)

PROVE 2 (FROM HER BOOK)

FIFTH ARGUMENT (the idea that women duties in life is childbearing)

DETAILED EXPLANATION

PROVE 1 (biological revolution)

PROVE 2 (without period and pregnancy no men in the society)

SIXTH ARGUMENT (the idea that women have a specific role in the society which can’t be change)

PROVE 1(FROM HER BOOK)

PROVE 2(FROM HER BOOK)

PROVE 3(FROM HER BOOK)

PROVE 4 (FROM HER BOOK)

PROVE 5 (FROM HER BOOK)

PROVE 6 (FROM HER BOOK)

PROVE 7 (FROM HER BOOK)

PROVE 8 (FROM HER BOOK)

PROVE 9 (FROM HER BOOK)

PROVE 10 (FROM HER BOOK)

PROVE 11 (FROM SITE/INTERNET)

PROVE 12 (FROM HER BOOK)

PROVE 13 (FROM HER BOOK)

PROVE 14 (FROM SITE/INTERNET-SPEECH)

SEVENTH ARGUMENT (the idea that culture -societal norms- social influence- social convention have to be maintain)

DETAILED EXPLANATION

PROVE 1 (FROM HER BOOK)

PROVE 2 (INTERNET/SITE)

PROVE 3 (FROM SITE/ INTERNET-TALK)

CONCLUSION

COMPETING INTERESTS

QUESTIONS FOR MY READER/VIEWS TO PONDER ON:

Credited to :

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